On Loveliness

Are you lovely? Can you remember a time in your life when you were lovely? I read in a book recently that the poet Galway Kinnell wrote that "sometimes it is necessary to reteach a thing its loveliness." Honestly, I do not recall a time - not even one - in my life when lovely was a word I would use to describe myself. Sad, huh? That there are people in the world who consider themselves lovely actually comes as a surprise to me, which is even sadder I think. Pretty, beautiful, attractive, appealing, easy-on-the-eye, marvelous, fabulous . . . lovely are not, at least in my mind, synonymous with Karen. If I do not believe these things to be true about myself and never have, how then, I wonder, did Mr. Kinnell think someone like me could be retaught? Reteaching implies it was something once known. Something once known. Hmm. Did I know I was lovely at birth? Right out of the womb? A time I have no memory of. Perhaps I did. Or maybe I was one or two or three when I knew myself to be lovely. Again, all ages I have no memory of. So maybe Mr. Kinnell was correct in his assumption that all beings know themselves to be lovely at one time or another, and because of this, perhaps be can be retaught. So how I wonder can I be retaught my loveliness? Is there a class on this somewhere? Maybe the local university? Maybe church or a Buddhist temple or a mosque or synagogue? Maybe a book or magazine. I don't know and therein lies the problem. I long to be lovely. For if I was - if I truly viewed myself that way - how much better life would be. I've searched for happiness; I've longed for it. Real, genuine, everyday happiness - not that pretend, make-believe kind but the real mccoy. If only I could find a way to "be" lovely, all the issues that keep me unhappy would fade away or at least I chose to believe they would. So from this day forward, I shall vow to relearn my loveliness. Instead of seeking happiness, I shall seek loveliness.